A Few Words to Newfoundland and Labrador

2000px-Newfoundland_Tricolour.svg

 

I wrote this piece a few years ago when the Powers That Be were deciding whether to relocate us (mainly Hubby, we could join him if we wanted to) to another province.  I wrote it because even though Newfoundland and Labrador isn’t my first home, the one I was born and raised into, the province where I spent my childhood or even my teenage or young adult years, I have grown to be a member of its community.  To be rooted in its existence; to be placed within its confines and be a responsible member of its society.  We are raising children into young contributing adults, who are attaining education and part-time jobs, building relationships and creating independent flourishing lives.  This latest budget is like a kick in the guts for all of the work we’ve put into creating a family rooted in a flailing province.  We feel like fools for putting our lives in the hands of politicians we trusted into moving the province forward, so our children could make lives for themselves here, and maybe not be forced out of its doors with their degrees in hand and goals thrown over Signal Hill.  We were wrong.  Now, with the encroaching end of University life for two of our ‘children’, we are egging them to move onwards and upwards, out of the province into which they have grown, out of the province they have called home for all of their lives.  Out to get better jobs, better lives and a chance at moving forward.  We may be going with them.  It wouldn’t be the first time we’ve contemplated jumping ship…or were asked politely to heave-ho.  This budget may be the kick in the arse we need to get there.

 We still love it here.  We still think Newfoundland and Labrador has a lot to offer, however, we are dismayed and broken- hearted over the debacle they call fiscal responsibility.  It’s not all of ‘them’.  We did this too.  Ugh.  So, do we jump into a plane and head Westward young man with our young adults to start anew, or do we stay and weather the storm that is this brutal budget?  Tough times, ahead my friends and the decision to stay or go will be made more visible as the cuts keep coming.  I can’t sit and pretend my head is not on the chopping block.  The cuts to services like mine are always the first to get the axe.  Vulnerable populations are swatted aside in the name of ‘fiscal restraint’ and are forced to deal with already difficult challenges made even more arduous due to our inability to put humanity first.  Compassion and human dignity are too expensive to support.  And so it goes.  I sit and wait to see where my fate will fall in the grand scheme of the government’s budget. 

Thank you, Newfoundland and Labrador for the past 22 years…    

From An Open Letter to Newfoundland and Labrador

“…I’ve had the privilege of living in a world where crime was on a much smaller scale, the children that my kids went to school with have become life-long friends no matter where on the island they live, and we have had family close by and far away, but never completely gone.  From Danny Williams’, our former Premier’s mouth, came the phrase “Newfoundlanders have an innate sense of responsibility for their communities” and I have witnessed this several times over.

  There seems to be a sort of communal outpouring of care for each other that is lacking in other provinces or even towns west of our shores.  Here in St. John’s, we live in a neighbourhood that embodies that spirit.  No child can walk down our street without the mother or father being friends with other mothers and fathers.  We make sure someone is home; we make sure there is an adult present and if there isn’t by some happenstance, we step in.  That’s called community, people.  Fundraising for playgrounds, for sports teams, for Girl Guides it’s all in a child’s life and my kids have done their share.  The understanding that family is the main portion of a child’s sense of self and giving that family the support it needs to sustain a life is an inherent part of being and living in Newfoundland.  The past year we have seen many challenges to that family life, with the provincial cuts and layoffs, however, I have also seen a spirit here that will surpass these pitfalls with the never-ending belief that their home is not away, it’s here.  Even if the jobs are scarce and the times are difficult, the young people forced out to look for work in other provinces, come back with a fervor that this is always ‘home’.  We have made friends here that have become part of our family.  We vacation together, live on the same streets, share the same worries and celebrate each other every chance we get.  There’s a foreboding that this could all somehow end.  That we could lose something or someone to change.  No matter where we end up, I will have my SLS family, my family in Central, my family now on the west coast and my mainland family.    

These provincial cuts have had a hand in our impending future.  Hubby’s job is tenuous at best and with the thought of another move forging its way onto our doorstep, I can’t help but be grateful for the past eighteen years here.  We have been able to raise our children in an environment free from abhorrent abuses of power, bullying, crime and rampant drug use.  Oh sure, all those issues are here, but we seemed to have escaped their reach.  The recent drive-by shooting has all residents appalled and angry that such violence has reached our rocky shores and so we should be appalled.  So we should be angry.  This isn’t indicative of the province I have come to know and admire.  This is what happens on the mainland, not here.  A mainlander I am and a mainlander I shall always be, but crime to this speaks of higher issues and greater responsibility.   Get ye home, b’y we don’t want this shit here.  We don’t want to be like everybody else.  We are unique. We are the home of quiet acceptance and hospitality.  Warm hugs and raucous kitchen parties. Tea and biscuits kind of people.  We are Newfoundland.  The only city I know of that when a TV show is shooting in any area of town, they broadcast the street closures on the radio and then the star of the show tweets his apologies for the inconvenience.  He’s sorry that you had to detour making you five minutes late for work.  He’s from the Goulds, Newfoundland.  “Innate sense of responsibility for his community”.  Yeah. 

That’s Newfoundland.

Thanks for the eighteen beautiful years.  I’m just looking for eighteen more….

God love ‘ya.”

 

I Call That Friday Night

The crick in my neck has me walking like the Hunchback of Notre Dame this week.  I don’t remember scaling the Empire State building or wildly ringing bells at a cathedral…but then again, it doesn’t mean I didn’t do it.  Just that I don’t remember….

I read today this photographer has just released an exhibit where he had friends drink wine and then photographed them at different stages after one glass, then two then three.  I CALL THAT FRIDAY NIGHT.   He turned it into a photographic portrait of alcohol-induced silliness and got hundreds of fans.  That is what planning does… I take pics on my iPhone and plaster it on FB like normal winos.   This Friday night is going to be very interesting…I’ll have to make sure the iPhone is charged and invite some friends over…Say, “Red-stained-teeth-are-a-few-of-my-favourite-things” peeps!  I wonder what a pic after five glasses will look like?

monkey pic

Oh.  ALREADY BEEN DONE.  Sorry.

I’ve been binge watching Scandal and I think I’ve started ranting like Olivia Pope’s dad.  He has the most epic speeches I’ve ever heard on a television show.  The “you are a boy” speech that saw him project his deep-seeded rage and ire upon the  Prez for holding him captive to help Olivia assist in her mother’s escape from her imprisonment (big mistake, there Miss O) was nothing short of inspiring.  It was practically Shakespearean in its delivery…If you have never heard it, try it here.

So, of course I hear this rant in my head when somebody is less than intelligent in their decisions regarding, anything really.  “You. Are. A. Boy.”   I need him to follow me around so I can have him recite it at random when I want him to lay it out there… “You. Are. A. Boy.”  Hubby forgot to put his socks in the hamper?  “You. Are. A. Boy.”   The guy in front of you in line at the grocery store has more than 15 items in the 12 items or less line?  “You. Are. A. Boy.”   The Personal Trainer at the gym you just joined told you that you had the lungs of a 65 year old smoker? (Actually fucking happened.  I shit you not.  I used some reeeelllly interesting words in my head and heard this ENTIRE speech)  “You. Are. A. Boy.”   I like it.

Memorize it.  Breathe it.  Live it.

You are a boy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Need A Dumbledore Right Now!

To say that I am dismayed and disheartened by the events in the upcoming U.S. presidential election would be an understatement.  More like appalled, disgusted, throw in some terror-induced exclamations of  “OH MY GAWD WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE!” and then back to disheartened.  I’m on a roller coaster of emotions ranging from broken-hearted to horrified.  AND, I’m not alone.   I’m hoping Canada will respond with some mad wall-building and sarcasm aimed at He Who Shall Be Named Asshole.  Seriously.  How is this even happening?  I’m thinking the Americans must think it’s all a big joke and he will go away with a wave of a Dumbledore hand and his magical wonderful wand.  It’s getting so that every time we look at a news outlet, he is screaming out some obscenity or random idiot remark with a fist raised in ire and terror.  Gee…I seem to remember seeing some shit like this before in history books and news reels from say, 1939-1945???

We need a Dumbledore right now.

Dumbledore

Be gone, He Who Shall Be Named Asshole! 

And with all of the shittiness with the economy and declining oil prices and the stories of horrendous treatment of girls and women in India with another gang rape, and ugh…it goes on and on.  The atrocities of society are starting to outweigh the goodness in all of the media.

We need to turn that around.

Let’s bring some goodness and humanity back into the world.

First, He Who Shall Be Named Asshole must say ‘Adieu’ to the political landscape…I don’t care how, I don’t care where…just go.  And while you’re at it, take all of those people who are called your ‘supporters’ with you.  AND, take the men of India who think women are dirt, down the mountain on a bumpy and ball-slamming ride on a flat inner tube.  AND, take all the murderers, gun-toters, baby killers, puppy-millers, kitten-haters and general dregs of our society down that same mountain in flat inner tubes with the rest of you!  There. That’s better.

Now, the rest of us peace-loving and generally good citizens of the world will do what we do best.  Smile.  Say nice things to make people’s days go better.  Take care of the sick and wounded, help old ladies cross the street, feed the puppies and kittens and the starving children and work for world peace, ‘CAUSE DAMMIT THAT’S WHAT WE ARE SUPPOSED TO DO.

Pug froggies

Because, who doesn’t love puppies dressed as froggies?  WHO?!

Now, if you don’t mind we have a lot of work to do.  So stop distracting us good people with your words of hatred and abominable rhetoric and take off, eh!

My head hurts.

bunny

Cuteness.  You. Are. Welcome

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An Open Letter To The Bootcamp Newbie

Dear Bootcamp Newbie,

I was you seven months ago.  I know how it is that first day.  You walk in not knowing anyone, not knowing quite what to expect.  You feel awkward and stumble through exercises that are unfamiliar.  You trip up on a Burpee and think everyone saw you and is secretly criticizing.  You forget how to do a dumbbell sit up and you berate yourself for being so idiotic about forgetting such a simple exercise.  Stop it.  Stop thinking we are all watching and criticizing.  Stop thinking we are rating you on your performance.  Stop thinking you are awkward.  Just stop thinking, at all.  Just do.

I was you seven months ago and trust me, NOBODY in that class gives a rat’s ass how you do a Burpee, or how you miss a step when you skip or how jumping makes you nervous…seriously.  I’ve fallen over a box jump, forgotten how to do all the exercises at any given time and DID YOU SEE ME TODAY?!!  FORGOT HOW TO DO A KETTLE BELL SWING.  IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS?!   Nobody laughed or yelled or called me dumb.  Nobody rolled their eyes or said anything.  I was reminded, in a nice way, how to do the exercise BECAUSE COACH KNOWS I FORGET SHIT ALL OF THE TIME.  It’s okay.    NOBODY is watching you.  We are all concentrating on our own shit to care if you did your kettle bell swing right.  That’s for a Coach to worry about.  Oh, sure we are there to assist if you drop a weight or to laugh with you if you do the wrong order of exercises (been there done everything wrong at least twice), but we are non-judgy.  That’s how it works.

Everybody goes to Bootcamp for their own reasons.  Everybody has a story that you know nothing about.  We all are trying to do the best we can with what we have and make the most out of a great morning class.  Sure, we are a little special for wanting to get up at 5am to exercise, but it works for the most of us.  That’s why we’re there.

I see you eyeing the others and trying to keep up.  Don’t do that.  Keep your eyes on yourself.  This journey is about YOU…not the other fifteen of us trying to keep up with ourselves.  You do what’s right for you…let us worry about us.

We don’t think you’re awkward, or silly or dumb.  We don’t think you need extra help or judge how your technique on that calf raise could use some pointers.  We don’t think about any of that.   We think you are awesome for taking up the challenge of getting up at an ungodly hour of the morning to sweat it out with a bunch of ladies and do squats until you fall down.  In our books, you rock!

So, stop thinking.  Stop thinking about us.  Think about how great you feel after completing a workout.  How the music got you through that last set of squats.  How Coach urged you on after you felt ready to fall over, or how we smiled when it was done and we got through it.  Take a break and pat yourself on the back.  Your journey is just beginning.  Take it and go with it as long as you like.  This is YOUR journey and you can do it.

We have already gone through what you are now.  We already know the journey is worth it.  Keep going.  We believe in you.

Signed,

The Girl On the Other Side of The Room

Chalkboard Burpees

 

Conversations With…The Dog

Me:  Mags, stop eating the sock.

Mags: I love socks.  Socks are heaven.  This one is my precious.  You can’t have it.  STOP LOOKING AT IT.  IT’S MINE.

Me: If you get all paranoid and possessive I will take that from you.

Mags: Oh, no you won’t!  You have to catch me first!

Me: Oh, God.  I’m not chasing you.   This is me walking away.

Mags: Okay, but look at the sock I have.  I’m going to follow you, and jump on you and pee on the floor from how exciting this sock is.

Me:  Ugh, stop being so annoying and PUT DOWN THE DAMNED SOCK!

Mags:  No.  I love the sock.  The sock loves me.  We are inseparable.  We Looooove each other.

Me:  You know the sock is a thing and not a living breathing thing, right?

Mags: Tsk, you doubt my intelligence human.  Now stop bothering me and look at my sock.

Me:  No

Mags: YES! LOOK AT MY SOCK. IT’S A GLORIOUS SOCK!!!

Me: Stop chewing bits off of it and eating it.  You’re going to get digestive problems

Mags: NO, I WON’T!  I LOVE MY SOCK!!!!

Me:  Here look.  Cheerios.  Cheerios are better to eat than socks.   Gawd, I think I said that to one of the kids before….

Mags: WHAT?!   YOU HAVE CHEERIOS?!

Me: Yes, and I’m just going to casually lay them here on the bed so you can eat them…see?

Mags: Hmmm….but, sock though…

Me:  Cheerios, Mags.  Come and have some cheerios…yummmm…

Mags:  Well, maybe just one…

Me: *snatches sock from floor as Mags eats Cheerios*

Mags:  I love Cheerios!

Me:  I know, Mags.  I know….

Maggie 2013

It’s like she’s saying, “Fuck You and give me a sock” but in a cute puppy way…